another true story

174.8?

i don't get it. well...maybe this hasn't been the best week---there's been lots of eating out, lots of feelingsorryformyself snacking and maybe not enough exercise, but 3 lbs? hmm. i'm going to weigh self tomorrow and see if it's the same...because i honestly feel skinnier--like my stomach is getting flatter and stuff...hmm. good thing i'm laid back about the numbers, otherwise i'd be freaking out!!!

true story

me: (steps up) so?????

scale: 146

me: no no no, you must not be feeling right. (rezeros and steps up again). and and and?

scale: 146

me: listen, punk. I was weighing 145 for the previous few day. I think you a lying %$^. (steps up again, toys with center of mass)

scale: 145.5

me: do it again (steps up)

scale: 145.5

me: again (steps up)

scale: for the love of god! 145.5

me: i hate you

scale: go away, psycho.

so, there you have it. no loss no gain this week. booo-urns.

it could have been worse...

i find myself thinking this a lot. "well, it could have been worse, i could have eaten 6 pieces of ___ instead of just 5." or "well, at least i didn't go hog wild and eat the whole thing..."

and while positive thinking is good...maybe i should be asking myself what i could have done better instead of eternally justifying whatever food mistakes i've made that day by comparing them to worse mistakes i've made before. maybe i should devote all of this mental energy to thinking of specific ways i could improve my {not especially fantastic} eating habits...

i don't know. just a thought. the more i do this, the more it seems like it's all a head game--just like anything else in life. mind over matter, right? (well, maybe--see bri's post below!!)

well...today could have been worse. (it could have been a lot better too). here's the scoop:

good things today: actually dragged myself to go hill walking despite getting up really late, and feeling generally anti-exercise. used restraint during 3-7pm when traditionally everything in the cupboard is calling my name. only used 1 tsp of the "crack" dressing at lunch. also refused to go w/ skinny bro to get late night fast food.

could have been better: went to lunch w/ skinny bro at our favorite mexican place. i wasn't so much in the mood for it (!) and wasn't even particularly hungry...but i ordered my usual. not the wisest move for the day before weigh in, eh? oh...probably should have stuck it out on the hills for more than 30 minutes, but i gave in... still working on more vegs. (i just like fruit better!)

what to do next time: probably should have ordered something smaller for lunch, or suggested we go someplace different and save the favorite place for when we're both starving and/or craving it...


so...i exercised 2. i ate at least 18 points for sure...i'm really not sure what the pointage is for lunch...great. i'm soooo excited for weigh in...

Brain vs. Belly

Did you read the latest NYtimes article about weightloss? They make it sound pretty hopeless, and I found the article very discouraging. Anyway, it made me think - should we trust our brain or our bellies? According to the article, our brains make it more difficult to lose weight, in an effort readjust our dieting efforts. But I can't listen to my belly either - that hasn't done so well for me so far. Is this why I need to count points, since I can't trust my brain or my belly?

FJ: ate 24, exercised 3, flex left 6 (resetting tomorrow). I just ate some salty snack at a party...I hope it doesn't interfere with my weigh in tomorrow. hrm.

Food Journal "Lite"

Sorry, folks, here's the "lite" version of my food journal:

Exercised 3, ate 27, 34 flex left.

More manana! nite nite



(See, "lite" really isn't as satisfying as the "real thing"...)

Arm toning?

Tonight, I've been working on toning my arms...by shoveling food in my mouth. This is the first time in the month or so I've been back "on track" that I've felt out of control. AND, I had to go to whole foods. In the middle of my toning exercise. I lingered for a bit in the cookie aisle (I really really wish I knew where the boy hid the cookies!) but ended up with cat food (not for me!), annie's whole wheat bunnies, and wasa crackers. Then I got home, and proceeded to shove annie's crackers in my big ole mouth (have you tried these crackers? they are sooo good - 50 per serving - wowzers).



But I still wanted a cookie. So I reached in the back of the pantry and took out the no pudge brownies (I'm sure these things have made the rounds of the ww blogs, yes?) YUM. I made a single serving (add yogurt, nuke for 1 min, 2 pts) in a ramekin and it felt all dessert-like - more like an overcooked molten chocolate cake. Anyway, in combo with some tea, I think I am finally satiated. I'm blogging on my points now, to make me stop eating for tonight.

When I'm not so sleepy, I need to figure out what caused my eating fest tonight!

Today: ate 29, worked off 5, flex left 7

Don't worry...be happy...

Skinnify quiz #1:

Who's who?

When did this happen?

Why did we do that?

How did we do that?

How would you caption this photo?

Prize: we're still thinking of one...

Today's journals:

Meg - ate 26, exercised 3, flex left 35

Bri - ate 26, exercised 2, flex left 11

moderately virtuous monday

well...nothing like a clean slate, eh? despite wanting to sleep alllll morning, i dragged myself out from under the covers and went walking this morning. and, i tried walking someplace new. it was good. i went to a park that has tons and tons of hills and i made myself climb all of them. i usually go walking for an hour, but it's on flat ground...so i only lasted 30 minutes on the hills, but i was really really sweating. and it felt good to do something different. (umm, the park doesn't have quite as many hills as that picture, but you get the idea)

the rest of the day was so jam-packed that i didn't really even have time to eat all day (*no, this really is meg, she hasn't been kidnapped, don't worry). i ended with 2 exercise, 21.5 eaten. flex in tact. i think i might have a little something before bed...1.5 points...hmmm....

oh oh oh! and thanks to soap box girl, i have been inspired to actually listen to my body, instead of just feeding it when my mouth wants food. after getting home from walking, i waited a record 2 hours to eat because i wasn't hungry! (don't worry, i ate 1/2 a protein bar before i left). anyway, that's pretty much unheard of around here, and hopefully it will be happening more often. (thanks mia!)

I am a tortoise

So, I'm still not losing weight. I knew it was going to rough from here on in, but the scale seems to be creeping up instead of down. I think the solution is to contintue doing what I'm doing (the tortoise method: keeping within points range and exercise moderately, about 20 points per week and making sure I don't get into a rut) and lose very very slowly, or be the hare (and go ape-shit on myself like I did last time I lost weight) and get exercise CRAZY. This time, I'm leaning towards the tortoise because I am too busy with other things to get all exercise obsessed, and because I am more likely to maintain if I lose slowly and with moderate changes in my habits. (Obviously, the hare method was only temporary for me last time.) What do you think? Am I going about this the wrong way?

FJ: ate 25, exercised 5, flex left 14

(The image is from Nut and Bee at www.nutandbee.com)

Dress, take 1

So it was horribly hot yesterday and we had a bunch of friends over so I made that summer dress that I'd been thinking about making. I was very happy to see that I didn't have to alter the pattern to make up for my pearyness - I'd read the direction wrong the first time - you add 20 inches to the chest measurement. My hips are not 20 inches wider than my chest. Not yet. Anyways, I was worried the dress wouldn't turn out well, so I used some spare fabric (actually, it is a "man" sarong from Thailand that my mom gave to my husband - he was happy to see it turned into something he'd never ever have to wear).

I followed the online directions, except for all of that pinning "preparation" stuff - I'm lazy. I also used 8 elastics not 6, and made the bottom elastic two inches shorter than the rest, to minimize the "isshepreggo?" look. I also made it smaller than the directions - I stitched the back a few times, b/c it was too big and billowy, probably shaving 3 inches or so off of the original. Anyways. It super comfy! and very cool for the these hot summer days out here. I'll probably make another, with fabric that I like more. Something flowery!

I spent the afternoon slaving over the drywall ceiling in our bathroom that we installed a while ago. It's in SIX pieces (that's a lot) and our joists were uneven...so my joining/skimming work is really hard to do. I've done a full sanding/skim on it, and its starting to look a lot better. Anyway, caloriesperhour says I burned 500 calories. And I believe it. It's hard work...the sanding and skimming and wiping...ouchers.

Today, I didn't do my pilates as planned, so I won't call it an SVD. But I ate 20, exercised 5, and have 14 flex remaining.

family traditions die hard

so. i am a Person Who Goes To Church, or a PWGTC, if you will. and i come from a family of PWGTCs. For many PWGTCs out there, Sundays mean big post-church family dinners and elaborate meals...

not in my family. sundays after church were declared by my mom (never one to do the "normal" thing) to be "every man for himself." what this usually amounted to was we got home and immediately started eating all kinds of stuff, standing up in the kitchen, chit chatting and fighting over the sunday paper...it was always one gigantic forage fest that would last about an hour or so...i usually went directly for the cereal (i.e. multiple bowls), my dad would eat chips & salsa, my brother would eat a gallon of ice cream and my sister would go straight for whatever bread product we had in the house. we would then all collapse in a massive post-gorge carb crash and take a 4 hour nap.

(notice, i didn't mention my mom...because she would usually make a sandwich and have some cottage cheese and then stop. funny that she's never had a weight problem. and she has a degree in nutrition.)

well, this sunday forage fest has been imprinted in my dna or something, because even though i've been living away from the fam for about 10 years, i still have my own little food fest on sundays after church. i admit that i save up my flex points during the week specifically because i know i will need them on sunday.

today, this was brought to light because we have a house guest staying with us... so, when i got home today, she was here...and i felt really self-conscious about doing the normal sunday food fest in front of her. as much as i wanted to completely raid the cupboards, having someone else there made me really think twice. which must mean it is probably not the best idea, no?

it also made me think about the concept of planned splurging. is it really a good idea? would i be better off without the sunday calorie festival? and more importantly, can i stop doing it? and the underlying question: can i break any of the bad habits that i've developed over the last 27 years? even ones that i really like and don't really want to break (like the sunday afternoon food carnival)?

well..i don't really have any answers. but i would be really interested to know what you think about planned splurges like this? good idea? bad idea? does it matter? and if you've been successful in breaking habits like this, how did you do it?


today was another 0 point exercise...ate 27...so i think i'm pretty much out of flex. but they reset tomorrow.

fast forward button syndrome

i am having one of those I'm Impatient, Can We Please Fast Forward and See What Happens kind of days.

i want to be skinny now. (i also want to be grown up and sophisticated and cool and crafty and impeccably dressed and know all the right things to say instead of all the wrong things to say and find a boy that i actually like and have an organized house ala martha stewart and become a person who radiates glowy health because i eat well and exercise and be extremely well read and build my business empire and also make time for the thousands of other crafty/cooky/bakey/domesticky things that i want to be good at.)

this always happens to me on saturdays when i'm not working. not working=bad for meg. i am no good at relaxing.

and for some reason, the fast forward syndrome always turns into the stuff food in face syndrome. why?! why do all of these "iwishiwas" type thoughts make me want to eat instead of, oh, i don't know, get up and start accomplishing something?

the fast forward button syndrome must be conquered.

points (sigh): 0 exercise. ate 30.5, so hmm...i don't even know how many flex i have left, but i only have tomorrow left...

tomorrow=new day, right? well, that's what they tell me.

New Career

OK folks. I think I'm really on to something here. I need to quit my current (very low paying) "job" to become....

an inventor. a diet inventor.

Remember Meg's post about what to do about people in your life who eat whatever they want and don't gain weight? Well, I've just encountered the same problem out here.

Before I reveal my brilliant idea, let me back up.

My husband is really skinny (BMI 18.5). He likes to eat cookies. And I like to bake them for him (call me old fashioned, whatever). So I finally cave and bake in 75 cookies. They are very tasty (oatmeal, made with real butter, of course, chocolate chips, cranberries, pecans, and a dash of cinnamon). And the deal has always been that he is supposed to TAKE THEM AWAY FROM ME. You know, take them to work or hide them from me.

This time, he wasn't being very nice. He leaves them on the counter. When I asked him to hide them he says "why don't you just not eat them".

????? because I can't not eat them. Its impossible.

Then it occurred to me: I need to invent a discrete internal locking device for kitchen cabinets. That way, he can have his own kitchen cabinet filled with his cookies and other evils. And even if I really really really wanted one, and would somehow justify to myself how I should have one, I wouldn't be able to get to it.

I first envisioned some sort of bar/grate system with a lock. But that's no good, cause I'd open the bag by sticking my evil little fingers between the bars. Then I'd probably pull a "classic Bri": breaking off smallish bits of cookie over and over again and eating them - because surely, many bits of cookies is the same as actually eating a cookie, and is calorie-less.

So it'll have to be some sort of solid tungsten steel type panel covering a shelf with a lock in front. We wouldn't the company to see the lock, so the fantastic anti-cookie-locking-device needs to be hidden behind the cabinet door.

For the time being, maybe I should try this:(Um, I don't know why this image suddenly became blue, but you get the idea, right?)

FJ: ouchy. hosted dinner party tonight. the damage is pretty bad. plus that ^&*%&$ cookie. 36 points. 14 flex left. no exercise (it was brutally hot here today - "felt like 104" according to the weather lady. and we don't have a/c). I know I'm not supposed to make excuse for lack of exercise, but I think today I'm quite justified.

blind date debacles and other friday night fun

hmm. counting today has been a little bit of a lost cause. got dragged into going to lunch w/ skinny bro who wanted to go to this greasy burger joint that he just loves. i got a turkey sandwich thing which i vowed to only eat 1/2 of, but ended up eating 3/4 of. avoided the fries though...then went on blind date that was...in a word, super awkward...and for some reason made me come home and want to eat everything in the house. i don't know why. i guess that's why they call it "emotional eating." (i only ate a little bit of bro's pasta and a fiber 1 bar, so i guess i did ok as far as emotional eating goes. if i weren't counting, there would be nothing in the cupboards).

exercised: 3
ate...hmm ? 35?
number of times i thought "blind dates suck and i hate all this stupid datey-date crap i just wanna go home and put on my pjs and who cares about boys because boys are dumb* could someone please pull the fire alarm so i have an excuse to get out of here": 1000's and 1000's


*ps--i do not, of course, mean to insinuate that the boys that you (my bloggy friends) are paired with are dumb. just all of the boys that i know. all of them. dumb.

Unskinny Reason #3

I don't like physical discomfort. Sweating is physical discomfort. Exercising makes me sweat, therefore I do not like to exercise. Therefore, I am unskinny. qed.

Today: ate 26, exercised 1 (nice, really great there bri), flex left 30

i'll take what i can get

-.6. now am 171.2.

gotta love the decimals.

was hoping for more...but oh well. i think it's time to step things up a bit.

Memo to body

Dear bod (more specially, butt, love handles, saddle bags, and thighs - boobs excluded),

I just wanted to remind you that you were doing really well for the past three weeks. But this week you seem to have forgotten which way you were supposed to be going. I'd just like to remind that you are supposed to decrease, attenuate, shrink, skinnify. The scale should read something <145, not above.

If you succeed in this mission, I promise to try to not over feed or underexercise you. And I will likely spend hundreds of dollars to encase you in new jeans (boobs still excluded).

Thank you,
Bri

(.5 pound gain, though I'll take what I can get, since I was weighing a bit more for parts of the week)

AND, this morning, hubby (who is happy b/c I baked him 75 cookies last night) said that he sees that I've lost weight and pointed to my love handles. YAY. he's a good boy.

oh kashi, how do i love thee?

let me count the ways...

6 points on the Go Lean crunch today. i just couldn't keep my paws out of the box. it is sooo yummy. i suppose it is better than having my paws in the box of my brother's fruit loops (i know, gross...but it's been known to happen) (i like cereal, what can i say?)

actually, i was trying to be good and was in the process of measuring out the box contents into single-serving baggies...but the kashi's powerful crunchy-munchy-sweetness had me transfixed and i was powerless to resist.

Today i exercised 4, ate 28.5 so i have 30.5 flex left. it was one of those ireallyreallydon'twannacountorexercise days...so i guess i did ok. i'm kinda nervous for the scale tomorrow. eeek.

Do I have to count forever?

So, ever since starting the blog with Meg and starting the whole "diet" thing again, I've been wondering how I will keep it off this time. (Last time was 3 years ago, and I had lost nearly 40 lbs. For the past year or two I have put about half of that back on.) How will this time be different? The first time I was so committed to maintaining - and I did, for a year or so. But then my exercise slowed down (x-mas break, my kickboxing instructor became a bit of a loose canon, etc.). Then I stopped counting. Obviously, I know to maintain, I will have to keep up the exercise - but do I have to count forever? I can't find a balance in this whole dieting thing. Last time, exercise and low-cal eating became habits, but then they slipped. If I am counting and weighing forever, will I also be forever weight-obsessed?

FJ: ate 25, exercised 5, flex left 9 (resets tomorrow).

I'm expecting a gain for my weigh in tomorrow - I guess my weight is just readjusting from last week. boo.

the power of suggestion

my brother (one of those naturally skinny people who "forgets" to eat, and then can consume 5000-6000 calories a day for weeks with no weight gain) has been obsessed with those ice cream drumsticks for the past two weeks. He eats a box a day. A BOX A DAY!!! These things have like 14g fat, 300 some calories and he eats 4 a day in addition to numerous other things like pizza, burritos, more pizza...etc. sigh.

well, watching him eat those drumsticks has been annoying. it's not so much that i'm a huge fan of drumsticks...but i do like ice cream+sugar cones. yum.

so, i discovered the skinny cow ice cream cones. yummy. they are very good and 3 pts each.

however, i ate 2 of them today. bad.

i did exercise...and ate some fruit. no vegs. oh wait, i did have some on a subway sandwich. and i got kind of snacky and wasted a lot of points on empty carby foods...and kashi and popcorn, which i guess is ok. well anyway, ultimately i had 3 activity points, ate 29 (!), so i have 32 flex left.

so, what do you do with the super skinny eating machine people in your life?

i swear half the reason i ever got into this weight-management crisis is because subconsciously, i think i should be able to eat as much as my brother. i can't though. why is that such a hard reality to face?

Holy Pepper!

Holy Pepper people! I had a looooong day at work today (so long, I'd only eateb 15 points with 5 APs by the time I got home at 9:30 - that is just crazy). But, it is Wednesday, the best day of the week to come home because my Boston Organics box was there, waiting for me. I know I've blogged about it before, but I had to write again because I got the biggest, most baddiest looking pepper I have ever seen. and its organic, grown locally here in Massachusetts.

Look at that thing! The pear next to it is normally sized. (Aren't those yellow and green squashes so cute?)

Anyways. WW-wise, I had good day. It would be an SVD, except I feel guilty for using up the rest of my AP's on hot chocolate (did I mention that I had a long day?) I ate 25, exercised 5, leaving 9 flex left tomorrow.

Pooey

So, I know it's not weigh-in day, but as you know, I kinda weigh myself a little bit too much. But this week, I'm weighing 1.5 lbs MORE than I did last week. And I drink tons of water, don't eat very salty foods (except during weekends, but its Wednesday now!), and I can't blame TOM either. I think the best part of weight loss is that having loss encourages you to lose more. I'm having trouble keeping perspective now because I feel like I'm going backwards. not very motivating. it makes me want to eat a big bowl of mac and cheese. any suggestions? Maybe I shouldn't eat at such regular intervals... I feel like its a bit early to go Wendie plan. Hrm.

eat your vegetables

so. one of my goals along with the losing weight and becoming skinny thing is to also stop eating so so so many things that come out of packages...and eat more things that require peeling, chopping, dicing and julienning.

here's the puzzling thing though: i genuinely like vegetables--i would even say i love vegetables. when i was a kid, i always took seconds of whatever vegetable my mom made. if placed in front of a vegetable tray, i will choose that over crackers or chips. i always order salad in restaurants and ask for vegetables instead of mashed potatoes. however, nowadays, i seem to buy copious amounts of vegetables that never actually get eaten. (insert bri's horrified gasp here) i don't get it. i like them. why don't i eat them?

so, i ask you, what do you do to make sure you eat your vegetables? do you have any strategies? or am i just a weirdo who buys vegetables and then doesn't eat them? (wait, don't answer that)


oh, and before i forget: today was ok...i had 3 activity points, ate 26, 35 flex left.

not so S-M-R-T

So, I'm totally lazy and didn't treadmill today. not so S-M-R-T. I'm a bad dieter. And I had one of those eateateat days. I'm resisting the urge to go in the kitchen and make myself a nice, warm grilled cheese sandwich.

Randi asked me to post a normal day of food, so here I go for yesterday, which was more normal than today:

Breakfast: blueberries, vanilla soy, uncle sam's cereal, coffee (4 pts)

Lunch: stir-fry leftovers (chicken tenderloin and loads of veggies) with brown rice (6 pts)

Snacks: yogurt (plain), string cheese, tangelo, nectarine (5)

Dinner: tossed some precooked chicken sausage (roasted red pepper flavor) with black beans, onions, peppers, corn and tomatoes. Topped with a dash of Zatar. (4 pts)

After dinner: lake champlain aztec hot chocolate: 3 pts.

(Randi - My food today was actually similar, dinner leftovers for lunch, then no after dinner hot hot chcolate b/c I got home late and had a nice pb+j! And the after dinner snack is not that normal for me.)

Now that I count it up, I didn't get too out of hand today, though I really want to. I ate 23, exercised 2, flex left 9.

the monday report

ok, sorry people. i am brain dead. (maybe i need more cardio--see bri's post below). i have absolutely nothing creative to say. but i need to get back on the old counting and accountability wagon, so i'll keep this very short and sweet...

3 activity points, ate 24. 35 flex left.

(yawn, i know. too exciting for words.)

i go bed.

S-M-R-T

Did you hear the news? Cardio makes you SMARTER. I could really go for some of that. Maybe my lack of exercise is a contributing factor to my new 6th-year graduate student status. (Don't ask me when I'm going to graduate, ok? I'll get ugly. fast)

So, if I can manage to get up on time tomorrow, I can pull a Homer on the treadmill ("I am so smart! S-M-R-T! I am so smart! S-M-R-T"). And, when I finally graduate, I should screen myself a shirt that says that too. Hrmmmm... Ah, never mind. Someone else already makes them.

I've been so tired today. I couldn't get up this morning. and on my bike ride home, my muscles kept screaming "STOP!!!". I almost walked my bike I was so tired. I have no idea why this is, but I took it as a sign that I should spend my last three points of the day on hot chocolate. Not just any hot chocolate. Lake Champlain Aztec hot chocolate. mmmm....

Ate 22, exercised 2, flex left 10

A different kind of wedding weekend eating fest

This has to be worth like 20,000 activity points, because i am completely exhausted.


So...this is one of my "side jobs" (i own a wedding floral design biz). When I do big gigantic weddings like this one, I usually work between 18-24 hour days for 2-3 days straight. (I really really need an assistant...) Usually I stress eat like a mad woman, partially to keep myself awake, and partially just because i'm stressed...and I did better than usual this time, but I still ate more than i should have.

I have no idea on the exact pointage (too busy counting the number of bouquets, boutonnieres, table arrangements etc.)..but i do remember eating 3 pieces of pizza on Friday night (in addition to slew of other stuff, mostly healthy, but too much of it)...then on saturday after i finished setting up the wedding, i had a gigantic hamburger and fries and this enormous brownie thing with ice cream. (i don't know if anything has ever tasted sooo good though)

I think what kills me on the weddings is not sleeping. When I'm tired AND stressed I have no control. Zero. Time to hire a real assistant. (anyone want a job?)

However, as i may have mentioned, this is my last mega-huge wedding for awhile. so, back to self-control, exercise and sleep.

Wedding weekend eating fest

SOOOOOooooooo. I kind of stuck my hand a bit far into the old "flex points jar" this weekend while on bridesmaid duty. Here is my confession:

Friday (ramp to sin): Ate 26, exercised 1, flex left 30

Saturday (sin day): Ate 40, exercised 0, flex left 10

Yeah, that's right. I ate twice my daily allotment in one day. Without any physical activity. Unless I can count freezing during pictues or walking on grass in heels. The good news:
- I left the buttercream frosting alone
- I asked for a small piece of meat, instead of the huge cuts the guy was cutting off
- I dumped half of my very delicious (read: high fat content) mashed potatoes onto the skinny hubby's plate
- I asked for nutritional information at the lunch place - it was the first time I've ever done that.

Sunday (guilt): ate 20, exercised 0

So, I have a bit of exercising to do this week if I cam facing 4 days with 10 flex points.

More than 10 to go...but getting closer

171.8!

I have kind of been a slacker, so i'm ecstatic w/ this #! yay! (just think what will happen when i actually try hard...starting next week.)

10 to go!

Whoa. WHOAAAA!!!! nice.

I didn't believe it when my friend 145 showed up earlier this week on the scales, but he kept coming back. So I was very happy to see him this morning - yay! I think I had actually lost last week t0o, but timing (u-hem) changed my weight right before weigh-in. So don't worry - I'm not losing weight at an alarming weight. And, since this is my second time around, I'm excepting it to get a lot harder pretty soon. But for now, I'll take it. 10 to go.

I don't notice much change in my clothes, but I measured anyway and have lost an inch at my chest, waist, and hips. yay!

I won't be posting for a few days. Bridesmaid duties are calling me away. I'm glad my points are resetting, so I'll have lots of extra points to eat at all the wedding events this weekend.

Smarty Pants

So I finished French Women Don't Get Fat. And I was not impressed. I thought the tone was very snobby and "if-you-are-reading-this-you-are-stupid-and-have-no-common-sense". She takes ages to tell you to do things we already know to do: make compromises, drink water, walk more, take the stairs, pass on the bread basket before dinner, cook your own food, eat yogurt, avoid processed foods... But her undertone was really "stop being stupid. when you are just like me, you can be skinny and fabuous like me". She finishes off the book by telling you how to maintain a relationship and how to raise your kids. I thought she was overstepping herself a little bit too far.

She really missed the main problem that I have, and I bet I'm not alone here. For me, I just like to eat. I KNOW about all those things she kept yammering about. I know it when I'm stuffing my face. So repeating to me how I shouldn't do those things isn't going to help. For me portion control is not innate. I'm not one of those people who eats a smaller dinner because my lunch was big. No matter how much I've eaten, or what little movement my body has had, I will want to eat 3 hours later. I feel like I either have to be in CRAZY WEIGHTLOSS MODE or eatwhateverifeellikeandtaketheevelvator mode.

However, reading her book did prompt me to start taking the stairs (I work on the 4th floor). And, the book reminded to try and enjoy a few bites of something instead of the volume of something. I'm trying to get used to not needing to be full/stuffed after a meal.

So I recomment French Women if you want to feel stupid or if you might need a reminder about a of the basics that you aready know. Either way, save your money and get this one from your library. Spend the $$$ on Fage instead.

Today was also a SVD: ate 26, exercised 5, flex left 20. I'm trying to figure out what I can eat that is 20 points in the next hour before my points reset....hmmmm...cheesecake? chipotle? >2 L of vanilla soy milk? Ewww. It's a good thing, I suppose, that I'm having trouble coming up with something that calorie-ridden.

Stress=snackiness

snackiness=not skinniness

boo. stomach back to normal growly self and brain back to "it's just 2 points, don't worry about it" mode.

i do SO much better when i work out in the morning.

today i ate 27 and exercised 1, so i have 29 flex left.


in other news...
i remembered that i saw some blurb on TV last weekend during my i'm-sick-48-hour-tv-marathon...it was some trainer who was saying that he tells his clients to put a balance ball next to their bed and do 100 cruches on the ball first thing every morning and before you go to bed.

i'm gonna try that.

stay tuned for washboard abs.

Unskinny Reason #2

#2: I fool myself into thinking that I'm skinnier by wearing my big-bri pants. Seriously. I walked around all day feeling like a million bucks, swimming about in my summer-weight chinos, vanity sized and all. But really, I'm not any skinnier.

The good news is that my large pants did not prompt me to eat more. Actually, this work-week I've barely been wanting to eat. I'm normally counting the minutes until I can sneak off from my desk for second breakfast, or lunch, or snack 1, or snack 2 (hrm maybe this will be unskinny reason #3). But lately, I've had to get so hungry that I couldn't think before I move to the lunch room. AND, when dinner comes, I eat some food, then stop before I'm full. It's weird. Hopefully, it sticks (well, the habit, not the fat...you get the idea).

ate 22, exercised 2, flex left 21

retraction

there is actually a picture online. i just didn't look hard enough.

(yes, that was soooo much easier than just taking a digital pic because i am soooo busy and can barely find enough time to write one non-thought-provoking post, let alone two non-thought-provoking posts with pictures...ha!)

and while we're on the topic of retractions, i'd like to retract my comment from a previous post when i said that i "usually don't like food in bar format."

this is wholly false. i like granola bars (a little too much), pria bars, luna bars, fiber one bars...and now muffin bars.

yes, i do have a crush on the quaker oats man

because he really knows how to work those oats. (and he is rocking the hat.)

i know my last product-related post was about another one of his fine products too...(Quaker Oats Breakfast Cookies...v. yummy)

i just have to rave about one more...

Quaker Oats Muffin Bars (both blueberry and banana nut are good). (*Apparently these are so new that there are no images on google. I could, of course, take a picture, but i am way way way too busy. or lazy. you decide.)

140 cal, 3.5 fat, 4 fiber=2 points. very yummy and fluffier than nutri-grain bars. actually pretty filling and satisfy the iwannaeatamuffin cravings.

i know. i am a carbaholic.

in other news, i'm happy to report that my stomach may actually be shrinking. yes, i ate 24 points, exercised 3. meaning i can still eat 2 before bedtime. (this is a first folks) i think i may just have me a muffin bar.

Mega Evaporation

Do we evaporate at night? Cause I consistenly weight 2 lbs or so less in the morning, BP (before pee). But the other day, I weighed 3 (THREE?) pounds less. Where does it go? Do I sweat like a pig? (Where did this phrase come from anyway - I don't think pigs actually sweat, isn't that why they cool off in the mud?) Anyways. 3 lbs? That is about 1.5 liters of water. Where does it go? I don't wake up drenched in sweat, and it's not boiling out here or anything.

Now you might be say "Silly Bri, your scale must be off". But no no no, I weight myself constantly (I know I know, I shouldn't, but I can't help it). I weigh myself several times before bed (BP, AP, you name it) and in the morning (BP, AP, after shower, nekkid, not nekkid, after eating, etc.) This several pound weight loss trend really exists.

OK, enough of my rambling. Today was a SVD! Yay! Though I only ran for 20 min. boo. ate 21 (am brushing teeth now to avoid hubby's nightly ice cream fest), exercised 24, flex left 21.

it's monday already?

well. here it is. the week that i've been dreading for a long long time is finally here. i don't know why this week in particular seems so daunting, maybe it isn't...maybe it's just that after the 18th everything looks so much brighter?

i'm (thankfully) over the (horrifically inconvenient) stomach flu. and now i need to stop the "i didn't eat anything on saturday and very little on sunday, so that means i can eat everything in the cupboard, fridge and freezer" mentality. the stomach flu did manage to break the terrible diet coke cycle that i've been in for months though (yay!)...i only had 2 today. (that's pretty much unheard of)

whilst lounging around and feeling sickly this weekend, i had some time to think some deep thoughts about my grand weight loss plan. i'm seeing parallels between the state of my house and the state of my diet...for instance, my bathroom is pretty much the last place that i clean in my house...because no one ever sees it. i'm very careful about cleaning all of the rooms that are open to the public, but sometimes my room and bathroom get completely out of control--especially when things get hectic. that's also when my diet and exercise seem to fall by the wayside too.

well, last weekend i cleaned my bathroom and room--i mean scoured and reorganized, top to bottom. and the whole time i was thinking "what's the point? you know as soon as you get busy this will turn into the train wreck that it always does when you get busy. what is the point of all of this work? just leave it. we've been down this road before." this, incidentally, is the same voice i hear in my head all the time when it comes to weight loss. the same voice that says "nahh. you don't really want to exercise. there's no point. you're going to stay the same weight you've always been. you'll fall off the wagon once and then stop counting and then we'll be right back to where we started. you might as well just hit the snooze and then we can go raid the cupboard...we've been down this road before..."

yes. we have been down this road before. BUT, i say to the inner cynic: this time WILL be DIFFERENT. just you watch.

and, so far it has. my bathroom and room are both just as neat and tidy as they were two sundays ago. and they will stay that way. and i'm still counting and exercising. (ha!-- so there, voice.) yes, this is going to be a busy week, but i'm still going to keep counting and journaling and exercising as much as i can. (so there again, voice.) yes, things have completely fallen apart in the past during weeks like these, but that doesn't mean that it has to happen this week. (so--take that you stupid voice.)

so, i don't know if there's some magical connection between cleaning ones bathroom and staying on track...or if it's just a matter of staying in control of things in general...or if it's just about kicking that inner cynic out of my head...but i think i might be on to something. at least for me, anyway.

those are my deep thoughts.

not so deep thoughts: i ate 27 today, exercised 1, so i have 32 flex left.

Kitchen makeover sneak peak

Here's the progress on our kitchen. The countertops went in today...though I'm still nervous about the color of the walls. I'll leave them this color (BM Wythe Blue) for a bit so see how I like it. Our faucet arrives tomorrow and I can't wait to have a sink again. It's the little luxuries, you know?

The worst part is the blank wall, so I'm trying to find something fun to put up there. I love this Marimekko pear, but hubby is protesting. This might be a war I'm willing to fight though. Mr. Bri, prepare for battle. I kinda pasted the pear onto this picture:

Today's journal: ate 23, exercised 3, flex left 21.

new love for painting

So, I totally pigged out today (are you asking yourself how this is different from all my other days? shush). Breakfast for lunch, ice cream, pb&j instead of salad thingy...the list goes on. But, I painted my kitchen. And it took FOREVER because I have to do all kinds of taping, etc. Plus there are all these nooks and crannies to fill in. It turns out that interior painting burns LOTS of calories! My 2.5 hours of painting burned 500 cals according to caloriesperhour.com. I think I'll just count half of it though, sounds too good to be true. So, I ate 29 and burned 6, leaving me 21 flex for the week.

stomach flu=zero points

ugh.

enough said.

Unskinny Reason #1

For short posts like this one, I'm going to start cataloging the reasons I'm unskinny:

#1: I eat too much. (Brilliant, right?) No really... Here just one example from today. I don't count half points. I'm too lazy. So today, I ate something that was 1.5 pts, which I catalog as 2 pts. But I wanted to "get all I can" from it, so I grazed a while in the kitchen to find a .5 pt item to round out my number. HELLO BRI? This is not how points is supposed to work.

FJ: ate 27, exercised 4, flex left 24

Friday=forage fest

Sooo...in celebration of the inexplicable weight loss, i feel like i ate all day long...but, i am making much better foraging choices and eating things like 94% fat free popcorn, berries, kashi cereal, and baby carrots. i am mystified by the scale reading this morning...i hope i can keep it up. hmm.

i still feel like i need to eat more protein and more vegs. and i feel like i'm eating way way way too much, but i always count/measure everything and the math turns out ok. hmm. the miracle of low-calorie, high fiber foods and fruits/vegs i guess!

today i exercised 3 points and ate 27. so i have 20.5 flex for the next 2 days. i guess i'm doing ok. why do i feel like i'm eating too much?

Sea greeny?

I'm so glad that you are reading skinnify, because it is really helping me keep on track thanks! We had our final "out" meal for dinner tonight, following by ice cream. So you know where this is going. Anyway, ZERO points of exercise (you read that right - no wonder Bri's not losing weight!) and 28 points eaten, leaving me 27 flex for the week.

Tomorrow, I plan to get some biking riding in. I need to paint the kitchen this weekend in preparation for new countertop installation on Monday, so I plan to ride up to Benjamin Moore and grab a few small cans for sample before I return for the gallon. We are keeping the applicances, greeny-tiles, and cabinets (might add oiled bronze knobs and pulls) but are getting new sink (stainless) and countertop. Do you have color suggestions for the paint? I'm thinking of a greenish blue color (the adjacent room is a nice red), so that we don't hightlight my ohso80s cabinetry. (And, I read today that blue colors are good for dieters - bonus!) Anyway, what do you think? I'm really limited by the floor, but I still need to choose brightness, coloriness, etc. I'm looking at homestead green...I couldn't find pictures except for this strange bathroom project, where they used the color as the base.

countertop

Hazaaaahhh!!

i am in total and complete shock. the scale reads 173.4!

(grabs calculator)

that means i lost 5.6 lbs.

(re-weighs self and double checks math)

5.6???????!!!!


Yippppeeeeee!!!! Who knew that the few minor changes i've made so far would help?

oh wait, all of you did! thanks for the encouragement. :)

now off to celebrate with a gallon of ice cream. just kidding.

nada, zero, zip, null

As you can probably guess from the title, I've lost nothing this week. Its a bit depressing, because at this rate, it's gonna take me a really looooooooong time to find out if skinny girls really do have more fun. This must be my punishment for gaining weight back. boo. hiss.

In other, tastier news, I'm enjoying my first-ever homemade Greek-style yogurt. The coffee filter straining system thingy worked really well. Too well, actually, I had to add some of the whey back. But really, it tasted very close to the real thing!

hungry, eaty or snacky? hmm...

am i an unusually hungry person? or am i just an unusually eaty/snacky person? hmm. can't decide.

today i felt like a 15-yr old boy trapped in a 27-year old girl's body.

ok, that's not what it sounds like!!! no, i just mean, if i hadn't stopped myself, i probably could have eaten through the whole house. literally. bricks, mortar, sheet rock, you name it. i was starving all day. starving. so i ate. no junk, but i felt like i was eating all day. hmm...we shall see what the scale says about that tomorrow.

so, i ended up with 30.5 points eaten, 3 activity points, leaves me with 21.5 flex for the week. yikes.

i think i need to start actually planning meals and such...i think part of my problem is that i don't eat enough protein and i need to eat more vegs (besides lettuce) to fill me up. this takes planning. so plan i shall.

also, i need to start journaling what goes in ye old mouth before i eat it. that will make me sit down and actually think about it before it becomes yet another 30 point day for meg.

plan. plan. plan. how come i can't ever think of anything i want to eat when it is time for said "planning"?

nervous for weigh in. scary.

Ode to Fage

So, aside from recognizing my peariness (should that be pearyness?) and almost getting run over, my day was pretty plain. Though I did have to eat out TWICE. Luckily, my points are resetting tomorrow for weigh-in day. Yay! My treadmill is out of commission for a few days while we have a house-guest, so I was only able to get 3 exercise points. and I ate 28. make that 29 with the TJ's dark chocolate square I just ate. So I've used 30 flex points this week. Not bad, though I wished I had gotten more exercise in. Oh well.

Since I have nothing interesting to report today, I just want write an ode to Fage, and the Trader Joe's cheaper version of Greek Style Yogurt. I've seen reference to it on some other blogs (don't remember which, maybe AngryFatGirlz). But it's wonderful. I eat so much yogurt that I often make it at home and currently have sort of coffee drip filter system set up in the fridge to see if I can emulate the good (though expensive) stuff. Even if I can't make the strained stuff, the original makes a really wonderful starter.

oh Fage
and Joe's version too
i love you
for you are so creamy
and nonfat
with 20g of protein
in a sweet sweet 2 points

you are so thick
and lovely
and are so very tasty
especially
with berries or honey

Cookie for breakfast? yes please!!

So, if you are like me and have just about the worlds WORST sweet tooth, these new Quaker Breakfast Cookies are awesome. No, I mean AWESOME!

I get the Oatmeal Chocolate Chip kind, which are new I think...and no, I don't eat them for breakfast...but I keep them around for when I'm in a cookie-monster mood. Which happens about every 3 hours. but don't worry, I don't eat one every three hours...well, most days i don't.

These are great because they're HUGE and really satisfying--they actually fill you up. And they're just sugary enough to make you feel like you ate something "bad", but not too sugary where it ignites the sugar monster within and makes you want to eat the whole house down.

One cookie has 180 cal, 6 g fat and 4 g fiber (3 POINTS!)...and a bunch of vitamins and such. I've also tried the apple cinnamon (kinda blah) and the oatmeal raisin (also good)...but the oatmeal choc. chip are my favorites! Anyway, these are a great "emergency" stash for all you cookie monsters like me.

URGH...large hips = large clothes

otherwise known as "Bri's rant #2". So I'm all geared up to make this super cute dress out of some cotton saree fabric I have. Then I realized after almost getting run over on my bike this morning (see below), that I'm going to have to change the pattern because by butt is so wide. damn pear shaped arse. Where are the large-assed crafters? It says I should cut the fabric for the dress to be 6 inches bigger than my chest size. Um, 36+6=42=Bri's hip size! NOT ATTRACTIVE. I'll have to measure some of my store-bought dresses to figure out how many more inches I'm going to have to use to conceal my pear-shapeyness. Suggestions? Sigh. Must lose weight NOW. Meg, should we start another blog called thecraftypear? ahaha.

And, I almost got run over this morning. I suppose I should have been more careful about making assumptions about slowing cars at crosswalks. But writing this makes me feel better:

Dear newshinygrayPriusdriverwhotriedrorunmedownthismorning,

Did you take driver's ed? Remember that part about yielding for bikes and pedestrians at crosswalks at major commuting bike paths? And that part about signs telling you to stop for bikes and other people crossing the street?

OK good. I'm glad you remember that now. Because when I stopped my bike and looked at YOU and you slowed down, it meant that you should be STOPPING. When I looked the other way, it was to CHECK FOR CARS IN THE OTHER DIRECTION. This was not me waving you to go while my head was turned.

When my wheel hit you car, did I scratch it? If it did, I'm not sorry since you tried to run me down. Maybe you should stop driving your little "electric" car around and ride a bike for a while, then you will learn to stop at crosswalks. or at least to not slow down and fool innocent bikers into thinking you should have stopped!

Disgruntledly yours,
Bri

A not-so EXTREMELY INTERESTING POST

Well, I DID (finally) manage to exercise this morning. Nothing revolutionary--just 60 minutes of fast(ish) walking. It felt good, even though I still had major trauma pulling myself out of bed. I never regret getting up to exercise, yet it is virtually impossible some days. Why is that?

I was sabotaged a bit w/ the parents visit and so I think my hopes of losing this week are pretty close to nil. We ate out twice today. (Twice in one day?! What are they trying to do to me? Fatten me up for the long winter ahead?) Sigh. It was fun, don't get me wrong! It's just a lot harder to lose weight when you eat out TWICE A DAY!! I ate salads both times, dressing on the side...and made pretty good choices the rest of the day. My best guess is that I ate about 30, worked off 3 leaving me 26 flex. Honestly, I feel like I'm gaining weight, not losing. We'll see on friday.

Good news is the parents are off tomorrow, so the constant eating out will stop...Work stress, however, is going to be major until after August 18. I kind of feel like putting losing on the backburner and just focus on maintaining for the next week. But, I don't know. I guess I'll just take one day at a time.

Well, sorry to keep you all hanging on the edge of your seat, but my EXTREMELY INTERESTING POSTS will have to wait another day.

Delivery Day!

Wednesday is one of my favorite days of the week - it's my Boston Organics delivery day. I get a great mixture of in-season fruits and veggies, delivered to my door weekly. In the summer, a lot of my box is locally grown. I started this service after reading Michael Pollan's The Omnivore's Dilemma (what? you haven't read it? OMG! read it RIGHT NOW!!! I'm serious).

It is so much fun to open up my box - it smells and looks great! And, I eat lots of fruits and veggies because everything in my box is "special". and and AND, I don't have to go to the grocery store all the time (this is a very good thing since I'm too scared of the wacko Boston drivers to drive).

• Black Plums
• Blueberries
• Green Pears
• Red Grapes
• Strawberries
• White Peaches
• Yellow Nectarines
• Kiwi
• Mango
• Avocados
• Corn
• Cucumbers
• Green Beans
• Green Bell Peppers
• Mustard Greens
• Red Bell Peppers
• Red Leaf Lettuce
• Roma Tomatoes

Anyway, I have an in-law visiting, so we went out to dinner. And, like Meg yesterday, I had sort of an issue waking up this morning. In fact, I missed TWO buses because I got up too late. I think it had something to do with drinking a bazillion glasses of water yesterday (I was sooo thirsty! Plus my complexion looks terrible, I look like I caught the chicken pox, I'm hoping the water will help). So, another zero point exercise point today after eating 28 points. Which is OK, actually, since it leaves me 11 flex points for tomorrow.

g'night bloggers!

Is that an...elephant on the roof?

this morning was one of those really surreal mornings...

i woke up to what sounded like an elephant on the roof at 6:05 am. then the phone rang and it was my pilates teacher calling to cancel class because she has the stomach flu. the elephant(s) continued to run around the roof until about 8:30 am, with me drifting in and out of one of those bizzaro half asleep/half awake states...awaking to think thoughts like "wow, you really should get up and go walking. it's not like you're even really sleeping, with all those pachyderms up there. c'mon. get up...get up...get up..."

hmm. another zero activity points day. go team.

(by the way, there weren't actually any elephants on the roof, sadly. they were painters who had been hired to re-paint all of the condo units, which i was not made aware of. i'm really not sure why they had to be on the roof, or why 6:05 am was the best time to have their rooftop party.)

i did manage to stay reasonably in control today, even with a last minute "let's go out for dinner" w/ the visiting parents...i was good and ordered a salad from the low-fat menu. I'm not totally sure what the pointage was, so I'll say i ate 24 points today and have 30 flex left.

Tomorrow I WILL EXERCISE if it kills me.

I have ALL KINDS of INTERESTING STUFF to post about (how about that for a cliff hanger??!!), but unfortunately, I must get some "real" work done since all of my time seems to have been usurped by the parents.

it will be nice to get back to my routine :)

("routine" meaning reading 11,000 weight loss blogs a day intermixed with about 20-25 minute spurts of "real" work)

Triathalon!!!

HURAHHHH!!!! I've had a SUPER VIRTUOUS DAY aka SVD (not to be confused with singular value decomposition, you nerds). I did a triathalon. Of sorts.

1. Run (um, does "run" describe jogging on treadmill so slow that I could be walking? It's the thought that counts, right?)
2. Bike (each way was pretty short, just 15 minutes, but it takes some effort to avoid the speed walkers and strollers on the trail)
3. Kayak (I know it's supposed to be swim, but oh well - and, kayaking really works the core and the arms!)

I think I'm eating out for the next three nights (ack!!!) so it was nice to fit in a SVD this week. I ate 22 points and worked off 6.

(the pic is from a few weeks ago)

HUH?

So I finally got my body on the treadmill for a full 30 minutes this morning - horaay! Then I biked to the subway. AP=4 (plus I'll get another for the ride home). But now I'm totally confused because I'm NOT HUNGRY. I've only eaten 8 points today (and its already my afternoon snack time, and I'm still not hungry). I remember that this happened to me when I first started running a few years ago. Am I alone on this one? Anyway, now I love my treadmill. Even though I was dripping sweat all over the place and my cats were looking at me like I was bonkers. I tried to take a picture of my sweat for you all, but luckily enough, the picture didn't really do it justice...

Tomorrow=another day...hopefully a good one

welllll...i guess i got greedy and was really hoping for a SUPER VIRTUOUS MONDAY....but it didn't happen.

my planned 60 minutes of a.m. walking (3 activity points) was foiled by my ill-advised 9 pm diet coke the night before. usually, i have NO trouble sleeping after a diet coke, but for whatever reason, i was up until all hours (2:30 to be exact) and then, shockingly, hit the snooze and woke up an hour late. i really could have used those morning endorphins.

i did ok until about 2:30 pm when i was somehow coerced (by visiting parental units) into eating an Einstein's bagel...and then was horrified when i discovered that it was 6 points. 6 POINTS?!! and didn't fill me up AT ALL. what a rip off.

so...that meant i had...hmm..about 2 points for the rest of the day, which is never my favorite..especially when i have had a zero activity points day. boo. so, then i kind of got grumpy and impatient and a little bit snacky.

(sorry, faithful readers, both of the skinnify girls are having a bad day!!)

Anyway, the end result is that i have 31 flex points left for the week. (ate 27) (ouch) (terrified for friday weigh in) (stupid einstein's bagel...grr) (i won't bad-mouth diet coke though, because it is the nectar of the gods and i probably would be comatose without it) (yes, i know i need to quit) (one thing at a time)

i don't know what all the parentheses are about. (sorry)

good news is that i have my pilates class tomorrow morning---yay! AND i managed to stay away from cream cheese on the bagel AND i stayed away from the granola bars which should earn me some sort of GOLD STAR.

Rant #1

Warning and apologies - this might be a little whiney/ranty. I'm just in that mood, probably because I'm hungry. And because I've just found a really cute pair of shoes that I can't wear because I think they will look too small on me. (And, I shouldn't afford them either...ahaha)

I'm feeling very impatient today - I want to get skinny really really fast and its just not gonna happen (I know, I shouldn't want it to happen, it's not healthy that way, yaddah yaddah yaddah). Its especially not going to happen if I don't make it a priority to exercise. I only managed 20 minutes on the treadmill before my sweaty-drippy self couldn't take it any more and got off. And then I started a new sewing project so I didn't do my pilates either. am bad. very bad bri.

But, I just checked out French Women Don't Get Fat - I'm sure its been blogged to death, but its still new to me.

Points for today: 22 eaten, 2 exercised

rant over.

OH MY GOSH, I DID IT AGAIN!

just kidding :)

Today I was good. Actually, I was super good. It was, if you will, SUPER VIRTUOUS SUNDAY.

I ate exactly 23 points...and had 1 activity point (ok, so maybe "super virtuous" is a bit strong...). I ate 3 servings of milk, all my fruits and vegs, no junk, no granola bars, no tortilla chips, AND I cleaned my house. Actually, just making this list is making me want to do something rebellious, so I'll quit while I'm ahead.

but guess what? i feel great! (who knew all these claims about eating fruits, vegetables and healthy (read: not 100% sugar) foods giving you energy were true?)

Erm, do nap points count?

OK, I had total blog-withdrawl this weekend, being away from everyone. But I did have lots of fun and was v. proud of myself for not toally stuffing my face in the presence of pate, bread, cheese, chocolate, fig cake, chips, and dried cherries. Though I thought it was very annoying to be counting points as I ate them, I am a bit of a control freak, so it was kind of fun to be in portion and point control. I can really be a cheapo (right Meg?), and I find that I treat my points like money. Unless its on third markdown, I'd better really really like it to take it home with me...I mean eat it. Whatever. Its late. You know what I mean.

Portion control aside, I'm still failing miserably at exercise. Saturday (otherwise knows as the day I ate 36 points without moving a single muscle in my body), I took a 3 hour nap. I think of it as 3 nap points. Do I have an allowance for that? I tried to justify it by telling myself that I need sleep to lose weight, but I've never heard anyone talk about nap points so I doubt it counts. Everyone else went swimming (e.g. exercise). But I was asleep, and didn''t notice my 5 friends wake up and take off. Sigh. Maybe this is why I'm the one how needs to count what I am eating in the first place.

So points recap from evil-food-filled weekend was actually not so bad! I'm still hoarding points for eating out 3 times later in the weekend when an in-law arrives for a visit:
Sat: 36 eaten, 0 worked off, 3 nap points
Sun: 26 eaten, 6 worked off

flex left: 19.

whoa.

Q: Meg is allowed 23 points per day and has a total of 34.5 flex points left for the week. If she earned a total of 3 activity points for the day, but has 10.5 flex points left at the end of the day, how many points did she eat?

a) i can't count that high
b) surely not more than 40
c) 50

A: 50 points.

Well. Here is a prime example of how the "all or nothing" mentality can really get you. I knew that I was going to have to go to lunch w/ my g-ma for her b-day today, and she picked this "authentic" (read: greasy) Mexican restaurant which i really happen to hate. (but, i am a bit of a snob about mexican food since i'm from the southwest). Anyway...i knew i'd be having a high points lunch...and i knew there would be tortilla chips calling my name. HOWEVER, i was prepared with my numerous flex points and 3 activity points and a resolve to exercise portion control and become the weight loss genius that i was born to be.

i think the (first) fatal error came when i decided to have a granola bar before leaving to prevent the "i'm ravenous, must stuff face w/ chips" scenario...maybe a good idea? i don't know--it might have been had i stopped there. then, for some reason, i decided that having a few more things before i went would be an even better idea and prevent the chip-face-stuffing that usually happens. I ate 6 points of "snacky" stuff that really didn't fill me up at all.

Well, long story short, i did eat the chips, and a greasy chicken burrito and the greasy rice that came on the side. and then when i got home, i just kept eating. and eating. and then i took a nap. and ate something else. and 50 points later, i realized that a) this type of scenario has been happening a lot in the last few months, b) this is how i mysteriously came to weigh 179, c) i feel sick, sluggish and disgusting and d) it is a freaking miracle that i don't weigh A LOT more than i do. a miracle, i'm telling you.

BUT...this is why i'm choosing to look at today as mini-victory (despite the ridiculous amount of food i ate)

1. I kept track of every single thing i ate and was 100% honest, right down to chip #38.
2. I realized how yucky i feel after eating this much
3. I realized that being out of fruits/vegs to munch on must never happen again.
4. I realized that granola bars are a "gateway drug" for me...leading to other sugary carb-filled things from packages.
5. I realized that when going out, i'm much better off just eating there and not trying any pre-meal preventative snacks.

SOooooo....that's all for today. I plan to be back on track tomorrow and stop all this 50-point silliness.

inquiring minds want to know...

(or is it Enquiring minds..?)

Ok, well, my newfound residence in the upper 170's entitles me to an extra point per day (new total =23) and an extra flex point. (i know this should not be celebrated, but is it so wrong to be excited for that one little extra point?)

So, total actvity points: 4
Points eaten: 24

once again, i am happy to report that it was a 100% junk-free day and on the list of foods were many items that didn't come out of a box or wrapper.

meg=would be weight loss genius?

i may have had a mini-breakthrough.

maybe.

i found this article "weight loss is all in your head" on someone's blog (sorry, out of like 11,000 blogs that i've looked through today, i lost track of exactly where i saw it...) anyway, here's the link: (apologies, i have forgotten how to do the cool kind of links that aren't the whole url.) (bri, help!)

http://www.cnn.com/2007/LIVING/personal/06/29/in.your.head/index.html

Well, according to this article, i should be a weight loss genius. I am a type-B person...(with a tiny bit of type D thrown in). no, for real, every single personality test i have ever taken has suggested that i pursue employment in the field of bookkeeping, office management, accounting, library card-catalog specialist, professional organizer, etc. or in other words, bean counting. (if you'd like to see further evidence of my type-b-ness, i will gladly show you my "plan, timetable and calendar with appointments penciled in" as described in the article. i'm also extremely punctual. and very structured. and (mostly) very neat.

so, WHAT EXACTLY IS THE HOLD UP?! why have i not been a weight loss genius thus far?

because i HATE bean counting. big time. not just a little bit, but A LOT. nothing makes me crankier than anything to do with numbers, math, Quickbooks, balance sheets, or accounting of any sort. (because i admit i do love to alphabetize or arrange things by color)

it's time to embrace the inner bean counter.

so, i've decided to take my own advice, which i dish out to my (music) students between 10-30 times a week:

"There's no law that says you have to like it. You just have to do it."



well, that's certainly enough deep thoughts for the day, possibly the month. whew. i'm all tuckered out.

French Women

I encountered the dreaded "lunch out"=wasted points. So, I had to scrape up a 2 pt meal for dinner to preserve those extra points for my temptation-filled weekend. Yay for grilling!

But I knew I was going to get hungry, so I rode my bike up to Trader Joe's (Meg, I don't know how you live without TJs...seriously) and earned 2 points - yay! It was uphill. I was sweating. and red. But oh well. I'd rather be red, sweaty AND on my way to skinny.

Anyway. I was riding back home, with baguettes sticking out of my messenger bag, feeling very French. Wouldn't it be fun to be a glamorous skinny French woman? I think so. I just need to remember that with all the rich foods out in front of me in the next few days. Skinny French women....Skinny French women...don't pig out...don't pig out. I love carrots right? Riiight.

So day was ok: 22 eaten, 2 cycled and sweated away. 35 flex points left. wahoo!

What the...?!

Me (to the scale): "Is this your idea of a joke?"
Scale: (silence)

179, people. 179.

The last time I weighed myself in May I was 162. How did this happen? Oh wait, it could have something to do with eating large amounts of sugar and fat and not getting enough exercise, using zero self control and putting just about anything and everything in my mouth (well, just food)...oh, and not sleeping either.

Sigh.

And, I'm very disappointed to report that two whole days of counting AND exercising AND blogging did not, in fact, erase an entire sugar-infused-face-stuffing-gorgefest summer. Too bad. i guess I'll just have to do this the old-fashioned way.

For the love of beans

I am constantly on the hunt for good, REAL food. And now I'm really learning to love beans. My recent obsession stems from the recent NYtimes article on quick summer dishes. Some that I like and that are easy to lighten up a bit:

4 Open a can of white beans and combine with olive oil, salt, small or chopped shrimp, minced garlic and thyme leaves in a pan. Cook, stirring, until the shrimp are done; garnish with more olive oil.

22 Make wraps of tuna, warm white beans, a drizzle of olive oil and lettuce and tomato.

34 Niçoise salad: Lightly steam haricot verts, green beans or asparagus. Arrange on a plate with chickpeas, good canned tuna, hard-cooked eggs, a green salad, sliced cucumber and tomato. Dress with oil and vinegar.

40 Put a large can of chickpeas and their liquid in a medium saucepan. Add some sherry, along with olive oil, plenty of minced garlic, smoked pimentón and chopped Spanish chorizo. Heat through.

51 Put a stick of butter and a handful of pine nuts in a skillet. Cook over medium heat until both are brown. Toss with cooked pasta, grated Parmesan and black pepper. (Just kidding, I wanted to see if you are actually reading this, teehee)

67 Rich vegetable soup: Cook asparagus tips and peeled stalks or most any other green vegetable in chicken stock with a little tarragon until tender; reserve a few tips and purée the rest with a little butter (cream or yogurt, too, if you like) adding enough stock to thin the purée. Garnish with the reserved tips. Serve hot or cold. (I've done something similar to this with lima beans...mmmm....)

73 Near instant mezze: Combine hummus on a plate with yogurt laced with chopped cucumbers and a bit of garlic, plus tomato, feta, white beans with olive oil and pita bread.

100 Cook red lentils in water with a little cumin and chopped bacon until soft. Top with poached or six-minute eggs (run under cold water until cool before peeling) and a little sherry vinegar.

Bri's weigh-in #1

So I weighted myself first thing this morning, before breakfast...since my coffee alone should weigh a pound or two, ha ha. According to Mr. Scale I've lost 3 lbs in 2 days, but I think it must be water weight. I've barely exercised...its been really hot and humid out here. I really need to put a window a/c unit in so I can workout in August. (New England doesn't do central air, its insane.)

Anyway, so my goal for the next week is to amp up my exercising. I'm going to aim for 90 min pilates+weights and 120 min cardio. And I'm not allowed to count riding my bike to the T.

I'm afraid I won't be able to fit in exercise today, which is making me grumpy. But we will be doing a few hours of rapid water kayaking on Sunday, so hopefully that will make up for it.

I have a lot of packing/cooking/shopping to do for Tanglewood trip and am trying to plan my meals so that I won't go over my flex points for the week. Sat night and Sunday lunch are lost causes - bread, cheese, pate, chocolate, fruit and veggies (obviosuly, I'll be hitting the F+V pretty hard and practice this new portion control concept again). For lunch on Saturday I'm thinking about making a quinoa bean salad or jicama/orange/avocado salad, salmon and light cream cheese on rye crackers (have to fuel the hubby - he's very skinny), and fruit of course. Do you have any good ideas on how I should avoid gorging myself this weekend? Because I'm sure all my foodie buddies are going to bring many many point heavy delights.

The Points Report

Ok, sorry to keep you all waiting...Here is my report:

Today I had 3 activity points, and ate 26.5 points total...so I have 33.5 flex points left. (But, I'm pretty sure that I used about 2 months worth of flex points last Saturday and Sunday...can you say mindless stress eating?) however, I'm happy to report that the list of stuff i ate today was a) junk-free and b) included such items as "clementine," "watermelon," and "fat free yogurt." AND, i measured my cereal. haven't done that in years. and now i'm also pretty sure that for the last few years I've been eating probably, um, about 20 servings of cereal at a time...it's actually quite shocking that i'm not a lot bigger than i am. maybe my metabolism isn't the culprit afterall...?!

Tomorrow is the first official weigh in day! (Ack) I think I'm also going to have a little date with the old measuring tape. More motivation (or masochism, can't decide).

ok, now you can go to bed.

Behold...the Big "Before" Backside of Bri

Folks, this has GOT to change. There is nothing like a picture to highlight reality. Sigh. I'm frankly quite embarrassed that I need to lose weight for a second time. I'm also nervous because I hear that it's hard to relose weight. We'll just have to test that theory, now won't we!

Portion Control 1, Fondue 0.

VICTORY IS MINE!!! I'm trying to keep all my flex points for this weekend, which I'm spending with my foodie friends at Tanglewood. So I was very proud of myself today for actually exercising portion control and eating something light (kashi+plain yogurt+blueberries = satisfying 2 pt snack) before evil fondue+sundae night with my girlfriends. I think one of the reasons I struggle with weight is that I lack any kind of portion control. I eat really healthy foods, but just too much. I actually enjoyed my small servings of fondue and ice cream tonight (9 points total, yay for veggies) by barely eating any of it. This surprised me. I'll have to practive this "portion control" again.

Anyway, I ate 22 points today and worked off 2, leaving my 35 flex intact. YAY!!!

I heart Pria Bars...

i really do. these things are great. i usually don't like food in bar format, i'd rather eat, say, a bagel or cookie or something....but these Pria bars are great. (and i consider myself a very reliable source since i find most protein/energy bars to be gross.)

i especially like the mint chocolate cookie ones (they taste like girl scout thin mints! no, for real, they do!)

-only 2 points!
-"as much calcium as a glass of milk" (or so i'm told by their website)
-a bunch of vitamins and minerals, 5 g protein
-they actually fill you up
-did i already mention that they taste like thin mints?

what's not to love?

Scary! The Before Pics...

Well, I've decided to take the plunge and post BEFORE pics of me. These were taken last week on the movie set (so please excuse the sloppy outfits! those are my "I'm going to be working for 18 hours straight and don't care what i look like" clothes).

(If this doesn't motivate me to lose weight, then I don't know what will.)

Here goes!





(umm, i cut my head off for the before pics....maybe i'll be happier to show my face for the after pics!)

Points Confessional #1

Ok...here goes for today. (This means the kitchen is closed now, right? right???)

Activity Points: 3
Total Points: 25
(3 points over, swapped 3 act. pts)

*This may not totally be accurate, because I am a bit of a "forager" and I can't remember how many grapes I ate today...but still, not knowing how many grapes you ate is better than not knowing how many swedish fish you ate, right?

swedish fish=big problem
swedish fish=singlehandedly caused weight gain of 15 lbs in the last 5 weeks
swedish fish=yummy




skinny=yummier

On Jeans Creases

I'm not a writer. I hate writing. So when Meg had the idea that we start this blog so we can finally get skinny, I was initially hesitant. After all, if were ever going to contribute (read: write) to a blog, I wanted it be about something "fun". But alas, I thought back to this past week and realized that many events were building a case against my weight - I am packing the pounds again. I knew that Meg's idea was brilliant, true to form. I have always struggled with my weight and even lost a lot 3 years ago or so. So I've been in self-denial for a year or two now, about my slow but steady weight gain. But this week, I knew, I just knew I had to take action. Let me illustrate:
1. I spent some time with a friend I hadn't seen in a few months. She kept looking at my hips, and did not approve (she is easy to read).
2. I tried to iron out the creases on the back of my "bigger" jeans. The creases, I'm quite sure, result from my ever-expanding thighs and give my legs a sausage-like look in jeans.
3. I was cleaning out my closet and many things had to be put in a separate bin. These include tops, and my problem area is usually by pear-shaped arse. Gaining weight on top means I'm in a new phase of weight gain.
4. The day of my annual physical, I changed out of jeans into lightweight chinos so that that extra pound of cotton wouldn't show up on the scale. I didn't want to be scolded for my weight gain.
5. I keep putting my hand on the new fat lumps on the sides of my upper thighs...kinda like an extension of my rear...this body part is new to me and I'm like a toddler discovering new parts of my body. BAD.
6. I had to change out of a tight shirt because I noticed bra-highlighting backfat. Sigh.




SOOOOooooo, this time has come for me to take control and get skinny. Or, just skinnier. Yesterday I weighed in at 152. At my lightest, I was 135. So, my goal is to lose 15 lbs. And keep it off. I'll start counting my points (net 20 per day with 35 flex points for a week), but this week my focus will be on starting up an exercising routine again.

B's points: ate 21, worked off 2, flex left 35.
Weigh in: 152.

"What's my motivation?"

So, I just got done working as a production designer on a movie for the past 5 weeks. There was a running joke on set whenever any of the crew members were asked to be extras (which was a lot, because no one will be an extra for free these days...but that's another story)...anyway, the running joke was to ask the director "what's my motivation?"--which is funny if the "acting" you're doing isn't really acting, but rather sitting at a desk or walking out of the frame etc....

So, now that I'm done w/ the movie (because it's not my "real" job), and more importantly free from the EVIL, ever-present CRAFT SERVICES table (the snack table on set, stocked with candy, donuts and everything else I shouldn't eat), I've decided it's time to get skinny. Not just skinnier...but skinny for real. Forever.

So, what's my motivation?

1. I won't lie. Skinny jeans! For those who know me, you know I am a bit of a denim collector, and it has been awhile since I've been able to wear certain pairs of jeans out of the house...certain very cute jeans that i spent lots of money on and now gather dust in the closet...I would like to be able to wear those jeans again while on my way down to true skinniness, which will be a new size, and will of course necessitate new jeans and lots of shopping.

2. Curiosity. Weight has always been tricky for me. I'm not obese, but I've never really been "skinny"... only "skinnier." This time, I'd like to go all the way. All the way to "skinny", and I'd like to stay there. Can I do it? I think I can...

3. Health/Disease Prevention. I talked about this w/ a friend the other day, but anyone who has struggled w/ weight issues before knows that reasons #1 and #2 on my list won't really cut it in the long run...there has to be something deeper to keep you going. So, I have a list of diseases and medical conditions that I'm afraid of which diet and exercise have been proven to help prevent. I'm terrified of diabetes, heart disease and cancer. So, getting "skinny" is really more about getting "healthy" and staying there. For some reason "skinny" sounds like more fun though...

4. Energy. "Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels." Heard this before? yea, me too. It's true though, being thin feels great. I'm tired of being tired all the time and dragging around. i figure if i weigh less, it will take less energy to drag myself around, right?

So, there's my motivation...(goals soon to follow)

what's your motivation?